Hair
by Samayoshi
Summary: Sesshomaru will go to any length, if that includes hiding every sharp object that can cut and anything that can communicate with the outside world from Kagome to get what he wants, then he'll do it, with pleasure. AU Sess/Kag
1. Chapter 1

This is a Sesshou/Kagome Kind of thing. I'm a Sesshomaru fan for AU and Fan Fiction but for the manga I'm totally a Inu-kag kinda girl. The reason is too complicated so if you really want to know you'll just have to review or send me an e-mail.

**_Hair_**

On a quiet Saturday afternoon a tall silvered haired man was reading the newspaper while a raven haired beauty spoke on the phone. The sun was shining to warm the room where a pleasantly quiet atmosphere had installed itself.

Sesshomaru was reading the business when his ears picked up a word in Kagome's conversation that made him quite upset;

"I'm thinking of cutting my hair" Said Kagome over the phone one day to Sango. Sesshomaru turned to look at the woman and glared. She wasn't going to get a pair of scissors near that head of hers, not if he had a say in any of this. He went back to his newspaper, smirking, having already devised a diabolically brilliant plan.

After being together for a long, painful and wonderful eight years, Sesshomaru knew Kagome to a 'T', as she did him, was thrown a heavy obstacle as they found that Kagome had taken after her grandmother who had died of leukemia.

After the diagnosis, the doctors hadn't given her more than a ten percent chance of survival, and that's if she didn't get cancer again. She had calmly went home and told everyone of the news of why she had been feeling so sickly lately.

It was the first time he ever saw anyone of his family cry and it was the first time he ever cried as he gently made love to her. When she was out, he would smash vases rip papers into shreds destroy house plants, and when he couldn't take it anymore he went into the middle of nowhere, as he let the beast take over whilst he screamed, cried injustice and howled at the moon.

He had no idea what was heading their way and it scared the hell out of him. Sesshomaru came home one day to find the artist hard at work, shaving her head and crying, having the hardest time departing with the hair she loved so much.

But after crying and admitting all her fears, voicing all her 'what if's, she came to him the next morning and stated with a chuckle:

"You know, you have enough hair for the both of us"

Sesshomaru knew she was a fighter. And fight she did:for three long and hard years, surprising all medical experts that she had lasted this long.

On the worst night of Kagome's hospitalisation, fearing she wouldn't make it through the night, Sesshomaru actually went to home, got on his knees and prayed. Addressed whatever power he thought was existent to save the only person in the world he cared about.

The week after Sesshomaru gave way to all pride and dignity in the single form of a prayer, having thought it was above him, was the week one of the doctors called, amazement in his voice as he stated that every single cancerous cell in her body had disappeared, that it was like she had never had. It had completely disappeared.

It was the second time he ever cried as he gently made love to Kagome.

A year had passed by and Kagome's hair and grown to a shoulder length. Hearing the word haircut made him remember all those nights he almost lost the only person he had ever really cared about. It made him remember her, morning, noon and night sickness.

So as to avoid her ever getting near anything that could cut her hair he had all the scissors in the household disappear; and that wasn't all this master mind had thought of, he had disconnected all the phones, so she couldn't call the haircutter. Beautiful in its simplicity eh? Then one day she had had enough told him to fix the phone or she was getting a crappy cell phone that cost a lot that he was going to pay for, the she was going to throw it out the window after he had paid all that money.

As soon as she made the appointment, Sesshomaru left the apartment slamming the door behind him. He came an hour and a half later from 'Chez Yura's' and shocked Kagome so much that she dropped what was supposed to be dinner.

"Holy crapiola! What happened to your hair?"

"This Sesshomaru has held the burden long enough, this burden of having enough hair for the both of us. It is now your turn to carry the responsibility" he said with a completely somber face. She wanted to giggle hysterically at the situation.

"…But, you're bald!"

"You no longer need to cut your hair" He said quietly

"Oh Sesshou" She awed. She didn't know cutting her hair was going to upset him this much! Maybe this was her inarticulate boyfriend's way of wording: "Please don't cut your hair! It's fine the way it is!"

To him her hair meant something more. It meant she was healthy, it meant no longer having to take millions of pills, it meant she never had to go to the hospital to be saved from the brink of death, it meant her freedom. She was free to do anything she wanted, but most importantly it meant she wasn't going anywhere but staying with him for the rest of her life.

"You idiot, I was only going to style it" She said after having jumped in his arms and kissing him fully on the lips.

A goofy smile spread over his face as they headed towards the bedroom, forgetting all about hair appointments.

Sure his head felt much lighter, like he was light headed, sure he felt a chilly breeze, but this was love, and if that's what it took than that's what he was ready to pay, tenfold, with no objection.

Of course later that week she had actually cut it, going behind his back but begged the stylist to keep the length. Kagome came home to find Seshomaru reading the paper:

"So what do you think?" She asked nervously

"Think about what?" He said gruffly

"My hair you idiot!" She answered aggravated. He looked up to see it was different looking.

"What was wrong with it?" Was his stupid answer

Hey what did you think, holler at me please , just click the little square button.


	2. Chapter 2

This is unexpected. I didn't want to write another but this just kind of festered in my brain by listening to this song. I absolutely thought hair was finished. Nothing much to say other than the fact that I update every seven years.

Float On

The doctor came in so slowly for Sesshomaru. He sits down. A somber look on his face. He had a feeling. The doctor gave them both a very long look, then settled his gaze on Kagome after quickly glancing at their hands entwined together.

"It's bad-" Sesshomaru's mind went blank. nothing of what the doctor was saying was registering. Time was slowing, things like : "low percentage" "survivors are rare"..."fight hard?... ..."energy draining" ... ..."spread everywhere". A small squeeze of his hand brought him back to reality. A reassuring smile from Kagome.

"We'll do it, we'll fight...can do it, I'm sure I can be a survivor" Sesshomaru looks at her. He already felt a loss. he had been disillusioned. She wasn't there, she felt like a memory.

She was disappearing.

and he couldn't do anything. He was watching her disappear.

He knew his silence was worrying and it was scaring her. He was quiet until they got in the car. The silence was has like a ton of bricks. Seat belts on, he took a deep breath and unleashed the flood of emotions:

"It's not fair!" In his outburst, he accidentally knocked the gears back into reverse. After his tantrum finished, he started the car without double checking everything. Kagome yelped out in surprise as the car backed up and then there was a crash, which made the two in the car become bobble heads.

I don't think I have to tell you why you're getting this ticket sir"

'"No officer"

"I don't want to think give you this ticket but I have to give you something..." The sound of paper being ripped.

"I gave you the smallest amount I was allowed to allocate

"five hundred dollars?" the police officer nodded and left. Silence reigned, then... a snort "pffft" horribly muffled, then it became a chuckle, an irrepressible giggle and then a full out laugh. A contagious side splitting howl. The mirth was rubbing off on Sesshomaru, he thought about then chuckled.

"It's not THAT funny..."

"Ahaha-yes!" She gasped as her sides started cramping. They drove off with Kagome giggling the whole way home.

"It'll be alright, it's going to be okay" Her soft voice full of confidence did not stirr the poison that was now spreading through his thoughts.

The first round of chemo hit her like a six tons of bricks. He held her hair back. It was all he could do.

He was sure that his heart was broken into a million tiny sharp pieces when, a woman who loved to eat, Kagome had lost her appetite. She stopped eating her favorite foods. He adapted quickly to the new routine of pills and hospital stays. He'd be there, at the hospital every other second he wasn't at work.

She greeted him all the time with a great big smile. Every day though, it was slightly less bright every day. The smile faded a little, day by day, it was less and less bright. Everyday he tried not to notice, but, ever the observant man, he saw.

For some reason, he keot having accidents. Spilling juice on himself, ripping his shirt, getting his wallet stolen while he was buying her flowers, then his car got wrecked, then it got stolen.

At night. He couldn't fall asleep, he'd lie awake and watch her sleep, observing her intakes of breath, the rising and falling of her chest kept these dangerous feelings at bay. He lie awake, till the early hours of the morning just watching her chest rise and fall. Finally when he was convinced that she would still be breathing, or when he couldn't anymore, he would close his eyes and fall asleep. He'd now grown this distaste for blinking, he would never admit it, but he was actually afraid of blinking. Maybe she would be gone, maybe she would be beyond saving.

She was disappearing.

He'd grown irritated with her carefree attitude on life. Not worrying about life, but then again, he'd probably be even more worried about her if she wasn't like that. The doctors would try to explain their way out of the fact that they weren't doing anything to help her get any better, she wasn't getting any better.

She was disappearing.

"You have enough hair for the both of us"

The day she shaved her head was the day he stopped sleeping when she was, his eyes would lull him into a false sense of security, bolts of remembrance kept him from really falling asleep. He was so afraid of her dying in her sleep, he wouldn't dare. As soon as she opened her eyes and smiled at him, he would drop his head on the pillow and sleep. He never told her how he felt, but he was so afraid of touching her, as if she would break in two or wither away, he was so afraid of killing her.

Then, neither had any energy but to sleep. Every day, her skin would lose it's fleshy color, he craved the day that she would blush again, the way her face would always hold that natural rose in her cheeks. She was pale and grey under her freckles. Her body was swollen, eyes permanently puffy.

Everyday, she would make an effort to smile. He felt guilty accompanied by this sick sense of satisfaction that now she only smiled for him, she reserved that immense amount of energy for him, that she had him all to himself. He also felt enraged that not many would visit her, and those who did wouldn't visit her often. Her special smile

When she was at the hospital, sometimes, he would cry himself to sleep. Sometimes he would just fall asleep, a peaceful slumber he would feel so guilty for after. Sometimes he'd fall asleep and wake up, panicky. A feeling of falling would wake him up from a deep slumber. When she was at home, he wake up almost every hour, watch her breathe then go back to bed.

The nurses wouldn't always let him stay. The days he wouldn't see her, he'd call her, check up on her. He'd call the doctors almost every day. He was consumed by thoughts of Kagome's health.

She was disappearing.

Finally, a doctor took him aside. This doctor was young, a young doctor he had never seen before. He took him aside and told him that Kagome was going to die. She was vomiting blood. Her organs were failing and there was no going back when your organs begin to fail. There was nothing left. He slapped the doctor, slapped the doctor again with all his might and ran home and cried. He cried until two thirty in the morning.

Then, he realized that this was something he couldn't protect her from. He couldn't fight it away, beat it to a bloody pulp, nothing. He went back to the hospital and snuck into her room. Around three o'clock he sat at the edge of her bed, and reflected, reflected on his life. In that moment, Kagome fled his thoughts. He let go of all resentment. He forgave his father for the feelings of abandonment that he had inspired, he let go of all feelings of resentment towards his brother for being more loved than he. He forgave his mother for denying him the tender touch and comfort only a mother could provide and then...he asked for forgiveness. As he was going through everything in his life, he felt lighter. Finally:

He forgave Kagome for disappearing.

Kagome woke and saw, at the foot of her bed: on his knees, eyes puffy, lips moving ever so slightly, mouthing words she didn't quite catch. He looked like he was praying. She smiled her special smile and soon after she fell asleep.

After a strange dream, they woke up not remembering anything. When Kagome woke up, she felt great, she was full of energy, compared to what she was used to, anyway. The grey color that looked like it was coming from beneath her body and was threatening to pierce her skin, was fading. He had felt something different. It made him worried, more nervous than he'd ever been. Every day seemed to bring her closer to death.

Things got better, though. He stopped ruining his shirts. He finally got a promotion and became his own boss at work. He ran into the man who stole his wallet while getting her flowers. He got a better car.

She had a new battery of tests.

He remembered the first time he'd gotten the bad news.

The same young doctor that he had slapped walked into the room, looking a Sesshomaru warily, he pretended as if he had never seen Sesshomaru.

"Hi I'm doctor Nash-"

" I know who you are" Kagome smiled at him. The boy fumbled. Looked at her then continued. It was then that Sesshomaru noticed people piling in the room, crowding around the door staring at the this small, frail woman that was on the brink of death.

"I'm here to deliver your test results" He shuffled the select papers he had in his hand.

"It's actually incredible, a medical mystery, so shocking and interesting, really...a cancer so beautifully developed. Intelligent beyond belief, attacking and systematically destroying every organ simultaneously, actually-"

"Aaden" A woman gently whispered.

The doctor cleared his throat.

"Right, mhmm. Well, it's quite miraculous actually-"

"Kagome…" Now, everyone who was oggling at Kagome were all crammed in the room. Sesshomaru was at a loss.

"Kagome, who are all these people?" Kagome chuckled.

"This is actually all the hospital staff that has taken care of me during my stay here. You remember Rin and this is Jinenji-"

"KAGOME!" One girl couldn't help but blurt, she giggled nervously "Tell her Aaden!"

" You're completely cured, cancer free!" Sesshomaru frowned, Kagome was shocked.

"How is that possible? A week ago she was vomiting blood! What do you mean she's magically cured? It disappeared?" the young doctor-boy looked confused.

"I thought this would be good news…" Sesshomaru felt horribly angry. Uncontrollably enraged.

"You're just a complete idiot aren't you? Do you have any idea what you're doing? Are you even a real doctor? I mean do you even have a brain? Have you cured her at all?" Sesshomaru's voice was raising.

"Sesshomaru-" Kagome, shocked beyond belief by his outburst.

"Cancer is like a mutilated cell that reproduces at a-'" The woman who had interrupted him before.

"Aaden." This woman gave Sesshomaru a look of compassion, all it did was irritate him further.

"You're pissed because you haven't had a decent amount of sleep in years, you've watched the person you can't live without, slowly rot inside a body you can hardly recognize as the one you knew before this madness, but you're so used to this shell of what this person used to be that this is what you're so used to. You're so...used to this that you're afraid of change, because you can hardly remember what it used to be like. You can't really remember what your relationship before she got sick.

The words were slowly sinking in.

"It's okay, don't worry about it. You're right, the doctor's are idiots. She did it, she survived all by herself, but without you, she would have died".

There were tears welling up, but he refused to cry in front of all these people, then...then, he realized he didn't care. He cried, he let out a frustrated yell.

"Oh God!" Was all he could say.

"The doctors might have given her the medicine, might have patted her on the back while she felt ill, told her what to expect, but you contributed goes way beyond that. There's so much the doctors and nurses can do for a person. We can hold their hand, tell them it will be alright but no one else could do have done what you did." The sense of support he felt, the understanding, it was overwhelming.

"It took me years and years to figure that out, and I'm still figuring it out, of grief only then did I ever get it".And by then it was too late…" One by one, the room, emptied as an awkward silence reigned. The tension and anxiety he had felt the nervousness, he had felt in the back in his head, came forward.

The habit of waking up in the middle of the night was a habit that died hard. He'd wake up in a sweat but then he looked at the woman sleeping soundly next to him, by his side. Her breathing was no longer labored. Her smell was going back to what it was before. It freaked him out. Her hair grew back, slowly. The puffiness had disappeared, and the blush in her cheeks returned….with her libido. He slept easier. He had waited, had waited since that night they had got the news. He had waited till she was completely cured.

"Will you marry me?" He was shocked when she said no.

Life had changed drastically . Happiness to hell and back.

Here Sesshomaru was in the hospital again, watching hiswife in the hospital. The anxiety and nervousness had completely come back.

She woke up and smiled, flushed.

"Don't worry, I'm sure she'll be fine" He scoffed.

"Don't pretend your not as nervous about our daughter as I am"

"Honestly? With her genetics? She had to have contracted a love affair with death for something to even GO wrong". He looked at her, shocked that she'd even think that. She chuckled.

"Come here" She opened her arms and waggled her fingers greedily: He got up and brought his chair near her bed.

"Relax...she's in good hands, now worry about me and the fact that I just pushed the equivalent of a watermelon through my vagina!" She said exasperated. He knew she was joking. He chuckled.

Sesshomaru had never been happier in his life. He woke up every few hours, but now it was because of something new. In a new home, a new beginning.

Kagome, gently padded into the room and yawned, she looked over at the crib and panicked but turned around and saw Sesshomaru, half asleep with their daughter in his gentle hold. Her tiny little arms wrapped around his thick neck. Her little fingers flexed.

Kagome smiled her special smile. Sesshomaru opened his eyes and looked at her. Kagome gasped, he hadn't looked at her like that, since before she was sick, he looked like he wanted to devour her. She held her breath. He gently shifted the baby and opened his mouth, then closed it again.

"Marry me"

He got up and put the baby down. He looked over to the woman who had given him everything and got down on his knees, he looked up at her with pleading eyes. She chuckled a bit:

"You never give up do you?" He stared at her unfaltering, waiting for her answer.

"Okay" He still looked up at her to see if she would retract the statement. She just smiled her special smile. He got up and scooped her in his arms, and kissed her on the neck. She whispered sweet nothings in his ear:

"I love you"

"I love you too"

He smiled his special smile.

Just for her.

Tell me what you think. I thought to continue but it seemed like a good idea to stop there. This is probably the end of Hair.


	3. Chapter 3

This is a little one shot from a strangers view from Shippo. Shippo meets Kagome on the metro.

Chance Meeting

I hate my life. My life sucks.

Another day of not fitting in, in a school I don't like. Feeling inadequate on an extremely hot, sticky day.

Worst kinds of days to be taking the metro. Sitting, wallowing in grumpiness, I do not notice the door opening I was too busy being grumpy, wallowing in my own self pity, listening to My Chemical Romance and Three Days Grace loud.

I was plugged into my Ipod, then my earphones stopped working. I was really grumpy. I was grumpy because I had a fight with my family the morning, grumpy because I had a fight with my best friend in the afternoon. All in all an 'uber' super crappy day.

The doors open to reveal people i don't see. The seat on my left is free, the one closest to the window. The mere brush against my feet made me irritated and as I looked I see a woman (I don't quite catch her face), the metro that had departed had suddenly lurched to a stop, making me almost fall off my seat and the woman who had brushed against me to occupy the empty seat, she fell forward, almost in my lap. As the train was moving again and everyone had recovered. The woman gave a soft laugh and apologized for being clumsy. I turned around and looked at her.

She was no one of importance, dressed like every other woman taking the subway. Her shoes were plain, a normal pair of ill fitted jeans with a plain shirt covered by a baggy sweater. No jewellery.

Then, looking at her face. The puffiness around her missing eyebrows , lashes and eyelids, the sickly pallor of her skin was what struck me first. She had a scarf, tied around her head to hide her baldness. She obviously had cancer.

But that was not what struck me the most. What had magically dissipated all negative feelings…was her smile….as corny as that sounds. It was not a big smile, or a small, inadequate smile. It was a normal smile, a genuine one accompanied by soft laughter. A peaceful smile, showing just a bit of teeth, the checks bunched up. There was a tiny crinkle around her eyes that held my gaze. This woman seemed serene, completely calm and happy. Why wouldn't she be? Looking at her, I felt the smallest twinge of guilt. I didn't know her but only by that smile. A smile that said a thousand words. A smile that spoke of love, and of being supported.

She had a lovely smile

Tell me what you guys all think.


End file.
